"We're
told the decision to make the change was made by a small select group of
people,
and not the church as a whole."
The main reason I felt led to start this blog was because of specific issues that I have had with the Church and issues that dear friends have faced from the 'Rock' in which we are supposed to stand, rooted on a firm foundation of God and in which hell, and therefore evil, may not prevail against.
"And I say to thee. thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my
Church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it." Matthew
16:18
What happens when it's a portion of the Rock that is coming against you? Is that God's hand moving? Or is it simply an unfortunate behavioral trait in which those who are holy are free to prevail against those that might be wounded or on their own path? And is it acceptable for the judgmental behavior of individuals within the Church who are deemed holy enough to come down against others in the Church, or maybe even those who are new to the Church, because they are hurting or struggling or confused or lost? (Let me be clear, I am NOT in any way saying someone who is gay is hurting, or struggling or confused or lost simply because of their identity.)
It was announced that a church in my hometown in southern Indiana has decreed that it will no longer allow or initiate individuals who identify as gay as members of their congregation. Current congregant members will be grandfathered in and allowed to maintain their membership, but there will be no future membership.
Maybe you are unfamiliar with the way most churches work, but in most cases you can't just be a member, you have to be accepted as a member and complete various interviews or classes. They want to make sure you are willing to abide by the mission code of that congregation and they have the right to deny anyone membership based on that opinion. There are various codes of conduct and theology issues that must be reviewed and discussed as an individuals membership within a specific congregation is meant to be a life long commitment and is meant to be a vital part of your life, and even more important, the life of your family/household.
I can understand that a church would feel called to address this issue considering the hot topic it has become as of late with the Chick-Fil-A protests and the gay marriage debates. They have every right to do so and they have ever right to make the decision that they have made; however, do they have the right to tell a person that he/she is NOT welcome in that specific house of the Lord?
I was on the receiving end of judgement from within my congregation at a time in my life when things were falling apart in all directions. I won't go in to the specific situation, but I was lied about and the leadership believed what they heard rather than trusting who I was, what I stood for and my proven character/behavior over all of the years we were in ministry together.
My duties were stripped away and I was made to feel very unwelcome despite the fact that I was one of the original founders of the church. That was when my first chasm between myself and the Church opened up.
A few years later I ran in to someone from that congregation and one of the first things she asked me was 'How is your relationship with Jesus?' Not how are you, how have things been going, where is life leading you right now or simply saying, 'Hey, it's so good to see you. Let's catch up!' Instead, she felt it was well within her right to ask me a highly personal question. I remember feeling so angry at that question. The first thing I wanted to say was, 'You have not seen, called, spoke to me in four years and you have the balls to ask me who I am with Jesus.'
Those years had been a time of real upheaval for me and it was a time
when I began questing everything I had ever been taught or told to
believe. I was high sensitive and very wounded and a question such as
that, while it may appear absolutely innocent and well intentioned, was
so very painful and added another nail in the coffin.
That situation cemented my frustration and offense at those within the Church as a whole. I was offended that someone felt they had the right to dig in to an area of my life that was highly sensitive. I began to review my life as someone who has caused offense to folks along the way and I got angry with myself. I was slowly realizing that it was acceptable for me to question, to stand up for myself, to stand up for what I actually believe due to my lived experiences versus what I was told to believe or I was told was the foundation of my very being.
Due to the fact that I cannot do anything about my past other than apologize to those I hurt, I have chosen to use my experiences and my gifts of discernment and encouragement to help others and to let them know that it is alright to be confused and question things. That is when God can reach you the deepest and where you are ready to learn amazing aspects you never dreamed possible.
I have developed very strong opinions on the American Church and what I see as harmful and damaging. I have listened to countless folks pour out their hurts, not the hurts from the world or from the sinners around them, but the hurts from those WITHIN the Church, those who at one time pledged to be strong and true breathern of Christ. And frankly, I'm tired of it! I'm disgusted and I think it is wrong! I think it needs to be called out and that the Church and those within it need to be held accountable for their words, actions, deeds, etc., in the same way they feel justified in holding the world accountable.
This is not one solitary occurance - this is one in a zillion occurances. I know folks that have been asked to leave the congregation because they felt called to confess a specific issue they were batteling and rather than receiving forgiveness and encouragement, they were rejected and asked to not return.
I know folks who have gone through divorces, some of them for 'Biblical' reasons and some of them not (which, let me just say, I believe is one of the MOST damaging lies of the Church). Some of them were based solely on a safety issue of the spouse and/or the children. Some of them were based on issues of infidelity or fraud or addiction issues. Regardless of what you feel or believe about divorce, it is a real and present issue within our society and it is an issue that brings someone to their very knees. The emotions and turmoil faced by a family in the midst of divorce is brutal and often overwhelming. What they need is comfort, love, kindness, encouragement, guidance in love. They don't need to be told that God hates divorce and that He will not bless them in their life if they leave this person, despite the circumstances.
There is a fine line between counseling and providing aspects of wisdom and foresight and standing in judgement - when you call someone out for something you don't agree on and then you just leave them hanging rather than providing in depth counsel and discussion and prayer then that is judgement, it is not Godly counsel in love.
It is not of God. Period. God does not turn people away who are seeking His face and His guidance. God does not turn people away who are in pain and living in fear. God does not turn people away who are sick or in desperate need of help. God does not turn away the hungry and he for sure doesn't turn away the hopeless.
I have heard, 'It's not God, it's people. People shouldn't reflect on how God is or how you live,' or a version of that sentence more times than I can count. And you know what my answer is, BULLSHIT! That's a sorry excuse for tolerated and accepted behavior - cause these traits are present in EVERY congregation, don't fool yourself in to thinking your congregation is immune. As a member of a congregation, flock or a part of the body of Christ, it is YOUR responsibility and duty to uphold the integrity of the definition of being a Christian. Be Christ like in ALL you do, not just the superficial surface appearances that others might see.
Yes it is people, it's not God, but those very people are the ones going around and telling everyone exactly what God thinks, exactly what He wants, exactly what He has in store and telling everyone that they, the people, sit at the hand of God and are harbingers of His message.
The examples of the BAD people within the church way, way, way out weigh the good elements and aspects in the eyes outside of the Church, in the eyes of the world. The BAD part is what the world is seeing, the very folks you are sent to help and heal. And they see that those not attempting to be judgmental are in fact condoning the harmful actions by not holding their body of Christ accountable.
Stop focusing on making the world accountable and focus on your own church. Focus on the real life needs being presented and seek out God's hand in each situation but make sure you aren't adding in your own human interpretation and agenda. Focus on spreading the message in love and in open discussion - leave Scripture out of it sometimes, it's way more in depth than that and it is necessary in discourse of 2012. Look at the foundational principles and ask yourself what the root of a scripture passage is saying and if it lines up with what you know of God. Does it line up with the grace and compassion you have received despite your sins? Does it line up with what Jesus was teaching to the prostitutes and lepers? Does it line up with what He desired the Church to be and the role He sought for it to fill?
My spiritual mother once said that the Church is meant to be God's hospital. He has appointed nurses and physicians, those that went to school to administer His word and His love, to heal the sick and wounded, and even the scared and lost who wander in through the big sliding doors.
Lots of the hospitals are good at welcoming new patients and beginning the triage portion of their treatment; however, somewhere between the ER and radiology the patient goes missing. After doing a quick search, the docs and nurses just chalk it up to the patients' lack of commitment to treatment. Further investigation shows that the patient did not leave willingly, they were politely ushered out the door when it was discovered that insurance wouldn't cover the tab. The patient was assured the big pink band aid that was placed over the gaping heart wound would do the trick as long as the patient would make the wound stop bleeding.
The point being, the Church is really good at welcoming visitors and they are even happier when they can issue a prescription for salvation and a promise that all of the hurts and fears will go away will a daily dose of prayer and the Bible.
The new, baby Christian is often rejuvenated and on a grand spiritual and emotional high. They devour the Bible, prayer, church, Bible study, Christian radio, inspirational bumper stickers, the works. They are feeling much better than when they came in the door.
Inevitably symptoms return or new ones pop up and the baby Christian is not quite prepared for the oncoming storm. They hit the call button attached to their bed and the nurse comes to check on them. The nurse assures the patient that as long as he/she focuses on the prescription itself, it will work. They just have to believe harder. They just have to pray longer. They just have to read their Bible more.
Before radiology can take a deeper look within to diagnose the underlying issue, the patient has been nudged out of the doors because someone does not see them working hard enough to hold on to their salvation, whether that means they aren't in church every week or they forget to bring their Bible on Wednesday.
The patient become disheartened when the prescription seems to be lacking and the supporting staff aren't providing the necessary relief. Those who sought to tell them how to fix their miserable life have disappeared now that the high has wore off and the rubber meets the road. They leave the hospital injured more than when they arrived simply because no one wants to take the time to tend to the infection and splint the breaks.
They don't want to take the time to do the upkeep and maintenance, it might require too much of a sacrifice. Read your Bible, raise your hands in praise and worship, memorize these versus and then sit down and be quiet. We will handle it from here, you just follow.
This is what I see from the American Church today. I want to be someone that listens and can help those who have felt hurt and lost and rejected. I've been there. I've seen a lot. I've heard a lot. And I want to help those with this specific hurt. Someone who has lived through it can be your best advocate and confidant.
I hope that the Lord works in the hearts of those within American Baptist East. I hope that someone has the guts to stand up and say that this is not right. It is not right to reject a child of God and tell them that they are not welcome to worship. Yes, you may not agree with homosexuality and you may see it as a down right damnable sin, but that person, gay or straight, is a child of God and is seeking to live his/her life in the manner pleasing to Him. Not pleasing to you. You are not responsible for others who sin, you are responsible for your own sin.
Does allowing that person to attend your church make it less of a Church, of make you less of a Christian? Cause I think banning people from worshiping God is the great sin and I truly believe God is going to be more disheartened by condemnation in His name than He is in acceptance and kindness to a fellow human being seeking His face.
God does not have a degree of sin - sin is sin. If sin is sin and you believe the only redemption from sin is the acceptance of Jesus Christ as your Savior, then it is not your place to judge whether that person's sins are forgiven or not.
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